In Defense of Schmoozing

Networking needs a rebrand.

There, I said it. Networking needs a rebrand.

A year ago, I got a life coach and she encouraged me to take StrengthsFinder, which is basically an online personality quiz based on positive psychology (highly recommend, by the way). When I opened my results, I was pretty embarrassed to see “WOO” – winning others over – was in my top 5.

“You love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. You derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with someone.”

So I’m… shallow af? What does that mean?

I took a moment and decided to keep reading to see what Strengths Finder had to say. Afterall, it is classified as a strength.

Instinctively, you may be lighthearted and cheerful. Perhaps you feel elated when you can start a friendly exchange of ideas with someone you are meeting for the first time.

Chances are good that you exhibit a genuine fondness for all sorts of people. Newcomers or outsiders intrigue you to such a degree that you start talking with them. You naturally put them at ease with your smile, encouraging words, or compliments.

While this explanation helped, it still took some heavy convincing before I accepted woo as a strength to be proud of. But as I look at my life I see it all come together. I’ve always loved connecting with people. Making them feel seen. Inviting them to be a part of something.

In other words, I love networking. There’s that word again. Maybe you cringed a little when you read it (kind of like I did when I was labeled as a “woo”). But it's not a swear word. It’s not taboo. It’s not slimy. It’s a skill, and according to StrengthsFinder, a strength.

So why does networking get a bad rap?

Because it’s often done wrong.

I recently started a dinner series I cohost with a couple of friends titled The Dreamer’s Table. We invite female entrepreneurs, industry leaders and creatives together to connect over dinner. Our tagline is “a night of deeper connection” because that is our goal. Deep connection. Meaningful conversation. Forward momentum.

snaps from our first Dreamer's Table dinner

At these dinners we sit at a long table and share a meal together while answering these questions:

• What are the blocks in your business?

• What do you need from your community right now?

• What’s a win you’re proud of? One you won’t stop until you accomplish?

We show up with an open mind, take off the masks and connect. This allows us to freely share learnings and advice, open doors for and encourage one another. And we always leave wanting more.

By the way, what I just described is networking.

Notice, there were no stiff suits or stuffy interactions? No ego or facade.

The day of “boss babe XYZ city meetups” are over and we’re onto the days of talking about real ish. Providing real opportunity. Creating true connection. My biggest wins are when I can connect two people who can actually help each other.

And it really is the best compliment to me when someone says “April is like the mayor... she knows everyone”. So I think I’m finally willing to admit that I’m a “woo.” A networker at heart. And maybe even own it.

If you’re reading this thinking, wait, maybe I’m kind of that girl too?

Keep connecting. It’s your superpower.